Jim aka James Robert Tritch, 01/10/1969 - 05/28/2007
I'm posting this in Michelle's words; Jim was a "brother" to me and I loved him as such--he was so much more to Michelle. My comments are in blue.
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In Loving Memory of James Robert Tritch
One week ago today I lost one of my closest friends. I was asked to write this in honor of him but how do I sum up a 19-year relationship with a few words?
Do I start at the beginning and tell how we met through a mutual friend and how he secretly made a $20 bet that he could get me away from another guy? (He won the bet but I didn't find out about THAT part until years later.)
Do I only share memory highlights of "Shake Your Booty" contests (which he won every time), Friday nights at "Rock, Roll, and Bowl," (How about Denny's and our favorite waitress, Lucy, at 3 am AFTER Rock, Roll and Bowl--and how she put us in our own corner, shook her head at our antics and welcomed us with open arms? Or my father banging on the door at 6 am Saturday mornings to take us all to breakfast, walking through the living dead crashed all over the apartment and still 90% hung over? My father's sadistic streak and evil laugh at that Saturday morning discovery to see how many bolted for the bathroom at the mention of food before heading to breakfast with him?) and bowling with rolled-up socks and empty wine cooler bottles on the kitchen floor of our apartment? (God I remember those nights--of course, we were so poor at the time, as roommates, we were often trying to put together puzzles or play Monopoly or LIFE--AFTER drinking the wine coolers so we could bowl with the bottles!)
Should I tell how we laughed at a little girl throwing water balloons off of a balcony only to find out that she had used multicolored condoms and he had to pretend to be mad? (the "little girl" is now a 26 year old mother of 3--my daughter)
How about the Smurfs, Cap'n Crunch (Peanut butter) and toe flicking? When my daughter was in her primary grades, she would come home from school and kick off her shoes--she still loves being barefoot. She and Jim BOTH loved Peanut Butter Cap'n Crunch. She would make her way into the kitchen, first turning on the tv to her beloved Smurfs cartoon. She'd pour a bowl of cereal and prepare to plant herself in front of her cartoon after a hard day's learning.
Unfortunately, Jim wasn't so fond of the Smurfs (to this day, any one of us can "sing" the first few notes of the Smurfs theme and laugh hysterically at the ensuing picture it calls to mind). Inevitably, hearing the first notes of the theme would prompt Jim to appear, racing for the remote to change the channel. He also let my daughter "win" in getting the remote before he did. For "revenge", he'd try to snag her cereal bowl. When that little tussle was over, he would proceed to "flick" her toes until she changed the channel away from the little blue creatures. The toe flicking, of course, set to howls of laughter, a bowl of spilled cereal--and the Smurfs playing in the background. Jim was my daughter's "Uncle Jim" and they adored each other.
How can words explain our long talks, romantic moments, and "hand checks" during movie nights? (I remember those "hand checks"--particularly on the killer couch that leaked springs and ate anything it could!--and the night the couch decided to "eat" the hands, leading to a chorus of "I'm stuck!")
What words do I use to say how he felt when he was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease - the same thing that killed his mother?
How do I explain when he wondered why all but 2 of his friends walked away when he had to wear a colostomy bag? (The utter sadness in his eyes when he realized most of his "friends" couldn't care less--Jim had real concerns now, life and death concerns, and those "friends" couldn't even be bothered to offer a moment of time for him?)
What words can be said to describe the sadness in his face when he started to lose weight and muscles because of this disease? (He of the quick temper, trying to punch out a parking garage pylon and breaking his hand and the ensuing emergency room visit--because someone "dissed" the friends he loved so much?)
Do I tell of when my sister came to visit and the two of them got into a dance off because he didn't believe she had been a main "ghoul" in the Thriller video--and he believed no one could outdance him--and my sister danced him into the ground? And how they laughed about it? Of course, the floor space wasn't that big so the killer couch played a roll in the dance-off, as well.
How about the time he tried to do another roommate a favor and filled her gas tank--unfortunately, the car took diesel and he'd put in unleaded?
Somehow, one might get the impression Miss Beth had the "party apartment". One would be entirely correct in that impression--and Jim was a huge part of that party. We were a tight group, our own set of Musketeers. We did a lot of laughing, a lot of counting pennies (I remember all of us going to the "cheap" theater for a movie--Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure--and having to roll coins to do it), a lot of "ordinary" fun stuff in Sin City (this was during Miss Beth's exile to Vegas for 14 years). But friends and roommates like Michelle, Jim, David, Howard, yes, even Kenny and Creston at the time--only come around once in a lifetime and truly leave indelible footprints in your heart. Miss Beth still has Michelle, David and Howard. No one can ever "break into" that little clique--you had to be there to experience it. Three parts of that group are gone--Jim to death, Kenny to prison, Creston to a life of drugs and crime. Three parts that can never be replaced, and yet, the time would not have been complete without them.
Do I tell how I introduced him to a friend of mine and how it brought a sparkle to his eyes?
Should I mention the depression that he went through when the doctors discovered cancer?
Do I tell of the horrible pain he suffered the last 7 months of his life?
Do I describe our last moments together when he choked out "I love you, too!"?
I don't know what words to say!
There's a lot of memories in 19 years that I could talk about - what do I choose?
I do know that I loved him very much and that I cherished our relationship and I will treasure each and every moment that we shared - both good and bad.
I also know that I will miss him terribly for the rest of my life but I'm glad that he's not suffering anymore here on earth.
Jim, my darling brother, former roommate, house-cleaner when he wanted something and I'd come home from work to a sparkling house and dinner made (MAN could he cook!)--I wish you peace. I wish you comfort. I wish you love everlasting. I love you.
Jim - rest in peace honey and know that you will always have that corner of my heart! I love you and goodbye!! Sphere: Related Content
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